Metaphysical Dilemma

by Michelah Desnai 

And I have found myself continually let down by people;
and I don’t think I believe in the goodness of the human race anymore.
I don’t think that a single human being can offer me something that I find useful to my inevitable journey in life. 
I find myself constantly in solitude;
Falling in love with parts of myself.
Discovering new adventures within my own mind.
Allowing my complexity to be a maze and my mind the game keeper. 
My loneliness keeps me warm and my sustain for others my companion.

Sometimes I feel like my creation was a mistake and some how my soul just slipped past heavens gates. 
So how do you tell God he’s not almighty if little ole me got past heavens security.

So how does a soul that was never meant to come to fruition live? 
When happens when they die?
Will he deny me like the angels cast down from heaven?
The ones he laid with humans and created giants...
To receive that treatment, I would have had to have been a special being, created for a specific purpose.
But I wasn’t. 
Just a mistake that got let out of the lab while Gabriel was on his lunch break. 

People talk about death like it’s the happiest part of life.
Maybe there is no hell, maybe earth is it. 

What happiness is allowed to a little black girl who refuses to live within the lines of her complexion?
Imagine living in a prison for 26 years of your life and nobody ever bothered to make a key. 

I don’t have to dream it, because that imaginary world for you is my reality. 

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MEET MICHELAH